What If It's Time To Pivot Your Business (Again)?

AMY: Welcome to the Peaceful Entrepreneur podcast. We're together, we're learning how to have peace in the process of everyday business ownership by improving one step at a time, how we think and what we do. I'm your host, Amy Stout.

Let's talk about changing your mind. In business because if you're a business owner, you've probably experienced changing your mind once or twice about anything from what services you offer to what kind of clients you want to serve to kind of the entire brand of your business.

I will be the first to say that I've changed my mind about a zillion times and the more that I did it, the more shame that I started to feel of like what are people going to think when I'm changing my mind again and I felt like every time I changed it, I had to do like a big reveal and announcement and it just started to get burdensome. And I am talking to somebody today who has also made quite a few changes and pivots in business and we are really just tackling this topic of it is okay. It is normal, it is okay, you do not have to feel shame.

There is a reason for the change. You grow as a person, you grow in experience, you grow in your passions. Like we just need to normalize the fact that there isn't a state that we're trying to reach that is just going to be this perfection that we are constantly going to be ebbing and flowing and changing and being in different stages of business and that is just part of it.

So if you've ever felt shame over changing your mind or doubt over whether you should do it or shouldn't do it or anything kind of along those lines, I really hope that this episode will give you some encouragement and give you some peace in knowing that it is okay and it is normal.

So let's jump into my episode with Kate.

Oh my goodness, I'm so excited to have you here today, Kate. Thank you for joining me on the podcast.

KATE: Thank you so much for having me. I'm so excited about this conversation.

AMY: Yes, we met like a month and a half ago and in that conversation, like our first like intro call, you asked me a question that like sparked the whole transition that I've been going through these last few weeks with my business, which is great. And then since then you have also made some big changes in your business.

KATE: Yes.

AMY: So we're here to talk about that today.

KATE: Yes, let's do it. It's not my first rodeo.

AMY: So not your first rodeo. I'm really excited because I think this topic of pivoting in business can be surrounded with shame. It can be surrounded with confusion, not the lack of clarity, but the reality is it's something that everybody goes through. Like we all change our minds.

We all grow. We all like shift in our passions. And so I just want to talk about today that like pivoting is okay and it's normal. And since you have done it multiple times, but also very recently, I'm excited to hear your insight on it.

KATE: Yeah, I'm excited.

AMY: Go ahead and share a little bit about your journey so people can know where you're coming from and where you're at right now.

KATE: Yeah. So hello, my name is Kate. And first and foremost, I'm a mom of two and that is the most important role in my life right now is my family and raising my babies. I have a two and a half year old and a 13 month old. And so this last, honestly, like last two and a half years becoming a mom was like a big shift in entrepreneurship life, lots of changes. So we'll talk about that too.

But I've been an entrepreneur for five and a half years. So I was an entrepreneur before I had kids and then now having kids. And so it's been very different and it is, it's caused a lot of pivoting and a lot of growth and a lot of change and some really hard things and some like hard things, but also really good things.

So that is like, you know, the foundation, I feel like for me with the conversation, but I also am the founder of Moms Day Out Collective, which is something I started actually in the spring of 2022. So it's been around for about a year and a half now. But we are now like fully diving into expanding it and figuring out how we can create more community and serve more women on their motherhood journeys. I had my first during 2020 and with the pandemic and all of that just like really felt like I was lacking community.

And then when I had my second, I had a community, I had these people around me and I noticed just what a huge difference it made in my life. And then not just in motherhood, but I have seen what a difference community can make in business. And when you lack community in business and entrepreneurship, because let's be honest, like especially online business, it can get really lonely.

And like, you're wondering if everyone is thinking about the same thing you're thinking about, or if people are struggling with the same things you are, or, you know, if you don't have that community around you, whether it be virtual or in person, it can make things a lot harder. And so I'm just a big fan of community. I've seen the big difference it makes in my life. And so mom's day out is yes, geared towards moms and, you know, women on their motherhood journey, but the mission and like the bigger picture of it all is just what a difference community makes, I think, in everyone's life, no matter what season you're in.

And so we do, you know, local meetups, we are planning events, we are getting memberships up and going, we're partnering with local businesses and online businesses, to also elevate other entrepreneurs and small businesses. And it's really cool. And it's been really just awesome to align my work with where I find the most fulfillment, which is in motherhood. And that was kind of the biggest thing that had shifted for me in like the last year, really like the last eight or nine months, like since the beginning of this year, just feeling like this pull to do something else and to like figure out what that something else was.

And through like a lot of reflection and prayer, and just a lot of things kind of came down to, you know, you feel the most fulfilled in this role as a mom and in motherhood. And like what can you do in order to serve and share this mission, but also how to be a business to like provide for my family, because at the end of the day, like that's something that's important to me too.

So yeah, we've been going through that pivot. And it is like I mentioned before we started recording, it is so different than any other business I've done. I think right now I'm up to like three or four businesses that I have done in the last five and a half years, whether simultaneously or pivoted from one to another. And they've all been online businesses, like pretty strict online businesses.

And this is a lot more in person and it's events based and it's community based. And so there's a lot of learning to be done. I'm also, you know, doing more like speaking and that kind of stuff. And so it's just, it's a lot, it's a lot different. And so there's a lot of growth that's happening. A lot of like learning that I'm having to do, but it's also really exciting and really, really, really fun.

AMY: That's good. I want to get to that, like the, the reshaping of your brain and how you're processing and how you're thinking about building. But I want to go backward first because the business that you had before this one, if I'm not mistaken, is you're behind the scenes BFF.

Is that the one that you were building before you even had kids?

KATE: No. So I actually had a different one before kids. So I actually was in network marketing for four years full time. Okay. And that was pre-kids. So I started that in 2017, end of 2017 when I was teaching full time. So I'm a former teacher. I have my master's in education. I was teaching in Los Angeles and at the time I started essentially like a side hustle, right?

And it ended up growing to the point where I was able to leave teaching and do it full time. And so I did that full time and it wasn't until I did it for like four and a half years, it was December of 2021. So I had my son in December of 2020. So about a year after I had my son is when I started to pivot away from that.

And just kind of like realign where my business was at. I no longer felt like aligned to that business. I learned so much from it and I do not regret a single thing about it. And I say this all the time on my podcast too. Like I think it taught me so many lessons and it really gave me a taste of entrepreneurship and like introduced me to online business. I, like I said, learned so much from it. And I feel like it's, I feel like a lot of times things are stepping stones, right? It was like a kind of a jumping off point for me. Yeah. And then it was in, so this is actually just a blip in time.

And in December of 2021, I actually decided to take, like try my hands at real estate. And I did real estate for a few months. It was actually the day that I started real estate school. I found out I was pregnant with my second and I was like, and it was unplanned. It was a surprise. We did want another baby, but we struggled with infertility before my first. And so we actually had had like a doctor's appointments, like goes to your doctor come January and didn't expect things to happen as fast as they did.

And the day that I started real estate school a week before my son turned one, found out I was pregnant. And so it was kind of this thing of like, okay, I'm going to like keep going through real estate school, but like, I'm not sure how this is going to look for my life, you know, moving forward.

But I did do like three transactions in my first 60 days, which was crazy. It was also really helpful with the mark, like the market was really hot at that point. And then just during that time was actually when I kind of like accidentally fell into being a VA and learning how to be an OBM and doing social media management. And that's when I started your behind the scenes BFF was kind of like simultaneously because of people I was helping just kind of on the side.

And then I decided like, okay, wait, like I can do this while I'm pregnant with a toddler on my hip, I can do this like from my couch.

Or, you know, when I have two under two, this feels like it's going to fit my life better. I actually really enjoyed real estate. It just like, I couldn't picture how it was going to fit my life, especially with my husband's schedule and stuff like that. It just wasn't something that I wanted to try and make fit. I wanted to find something that fit it better. And so that's when I started your behind the scenes BFF, which was first just me providing VA services and OBM services. And then it turned into an agency.

And then at one point, we ended up dissolving the agency. And it turned more into like an education brand where we were teaching women how to build businesses as VAs. And so I still have your behind the scenes BFF. I still, the course is still very much alive and well.

We still have our community. I'm still doing some coaching on that side. But yeah, since then we've shifted our focus again to Mom's Day Out Collective, which I actually started at the same time I started your behind the scenes BFF. So we actually started them at the same time. Yeah, they've just had different stages of growth and periods of time where they're growing.

AMY: Yeah. So interesting.

Okay, so let's talk about the concept of pivoting because you have kind of described quite a few situations now where you have pivoted. But what would you say are the things that kind of jump started the process in your brain of like, yeah, I might want to change my mind.

KATE: Yeah, I feel like each scenario has been different. But I think that like the overall theme has just been like the growth that I've made as a person, or like the change that I've gone through personally, like I said, like finding out I was pregnant and knowing I'm going to have 202.

It didn't feel like real estate was going to be that thing for me. It didn't feel like it was going to be sustainable or like in alignment with where what my goals were and what our family goals were. And so it was kind of like time to make that pivot time to make that shift into something that was more aligned.

And then in the same thing with network marketing, like it was, you know, I had been doing something for several years before I was a mom. And then once I became a mom, it was like, okay, like my definition of success changed a lot when I became a mom. And my definition, like my goals changed what I what motivated me previously no longer motivated me. And so a lot of that changed once I became a mom and just like in motherhood.

And I think that can happen at any time. I don't think it takes like having kids to have that realization. But for me, that's when it happened. And so I knew that like I needed to do something different.

And then now this most recent pivot, it's been a lot of I really I think it's just been like, like I said, like step, you know, everything being a stepping stone, everything has got me closer to where I'm at now. And I'm Christian. And so a lot of mine has to do with my faith and just like feeling like, I talked about this before, but I kind of felt like every time I made a pivot, every time I made a change, it was like God was saying like, okay, you're closer, but you're not there yet. And like, you're closer to what I'm calling you to do.

But like, you're not quite there. And but each time it's gotten closer. And this last year, I really struggled in the beginning of the year with my mental health postpartum. And I really started to get away from like, what was the true reason I like became an entrepreneur? Why do I have a business in the first place? There were times where I felt like I wanted to quit, like I wanted to just go back to teaching or go get a nine to five, because I felt like it would be like, quote unquote, easier. And I really, really struggled with that.

And then I actually was diagnosed with ADHD in the spring. And maybe that has something to do with me changing my mind so much. But there are a lot of reflection. I'm like, okay, that makes sense. But having that diagnosis and just validation of like, this is why your brain is wired the way that it's wired. And this is why sometimes it's hard for me to turn it off. And like, you know, wanting wanting that nine to five or wanting that other job, I'm like, okay, if I just like had that, then I could just like turn my brain off.

And I could just like clock in and out. And like, that would be so much easier than like, thinking about it all the time. But that's not the reality of like, how my brain works. Like my like, I, I would do that. And then I'd probably like start a side business because I would want to be doing something else.

And so I think just having like that validation and then really diving into like therapy and mental health and like taking true care of myself and like spending a lot more time listening and being quiet and resting kind of like opened up more questions that I had for myself and my life and asking like, is this actually what I want to do? Is this actually aligned to our family goals to my goals to, you know, how I want to spend my day? Like, what is my perfect week look like?

And so asking all these questions and also like, is this my greater purpose? Is this my greater mission? Is this like what I'm actually called to do? And so asking these questions and having these hard conversations, you know, with myself in therapy with my family and friends, really, I started to find that I was searching for fulfillment in all the wrong places.

And I think for a long time, I've searched, I've tried to find fulfillment in a business or in a career or in success or, and when I hit that goal or when I hit that number of income, like then I'll be fulfilled and like, then I'll have like accomplished the thing.

But I built two six figure businesses and still did not feel the sense of fulfillment that I feel right now. And I think it's because I've realized that like my fulfillment really comes from motherhood and it also comes from God and my faith. And I think that that realization has now helped me see, okay, how can I, that's like the source of my fulfillment. I still gotta pay my bills. I still gotta like provide for my family.

And like, and I also want to like, I also am an entrepreneur. I'm business minded. I want to have things outside of motherhood to work on. And that is really from a place of service. And so that brought me back to mom's day out because we, we did it last year. We took a break when I was on maternity leave. And then this year, it was kind of this thing that got pushed to the side because it wasn't something that was making money. It was, it's a lot of work to host events and meetups and plan these things out, especially when you're not, you don't know how to do it. And you're not like making it a priority.

And since it wasn't making an income, I was having, you know, to focus on things that were making an income for my family at the time. But I just kept getting this pull like back to mom's day out collective. And it was really just something that I was like, okay, like this is, this is something that is so needed. And it is something that I'm so passionate about. And like, yeah, it's not like making money right now, you know, before, even now, as we're building it from the ground up, just like any business.

But like, what can I do to ensure that it does? And what can I do to like, have it be a business that is really based in community and service and empowering and encouraging other women. And, but also, I'm able to provide for my family.

And it's aligned so closely with what I am fulfilled in. And so that's, that's what we've been working on. And we have so many like amazing things that are like right on the surface by being launched and like happening. And I just can't wait to, you know, continue to just see it grow and expand and spread our mission, share a mission everywhere, everyone.

AMY: Oh, I love that. That's so incredible. And one of the things that you said is like something that I, it's probably one of the biggest piece of ice that I would ever give an entrepreneur is just to take time to set back and think and let yourself process.

That is probably the best thing that you can do for your business and for yourself as a business owner. And I feel like I didn't, I didn't practice that for at first because I was just like idea, action, idea, action. And that's kind of how you have to start to, you know, get your feet off, you know, get off the ground and get experience. But that's not how you can sustain.

KATE: Sustain. Yeah. And that's, I mean, that's hustle culture, right? Like I know a lot of us are feeling burnt out from hustle culture and I was like, definitely a participant in hustle culture for a long time. And I think the last two and a half years, two years, I've really forced myself to slow down and to ask questions and to just like be and be like, is this really what I want to do?

Or is this just like an idea that I want to just like, you know, take action on and like get off the ground. And I actually went to a live event a couple weeks ago. And the thing that kept popping up for me was that this time I want to do it right versus do it fast.

And obviously, I'm also a big proponent of this saying like done is better than perfect. But I think that because I don't think perfection is attainable. So, you know, there's just a fine line that you can walk between those two. Because being something done right or done well does not mean perfect. It does mean like, just putting it out into the world. But it also means like, reflecting and taking time to figure out like, is this the service I want to provide? Is this actually the product I want to create asking yourself the questions about like the sustainability and I heard something too that was, it was run well, not fast.

And that's just that's something that has really stuck with me, especially in the season of my life. And so even in the last several months, I'm like, Oh, I have this really great idea. I'm like, this is it like this is going to be so awesome. And then I let myself sit with it for a day or two.

And I'm like, No, I don't think that's it.

I don't think I'm there yet. You know, and just like really like thinking about it, journaling about it, reflecting on it, praying about it, whatever it looks like for you. And I think it's so important. And that's, it's the opposite of hustle culture. It's, you know, you also don't want to overthink it. You don't want to be so stuck in like analysis paralysis.

But there is such a strength in being able to plan things out long term or being able to sit with ideas and actually make sure like it's, it's the way you want to go because then I think it can help a lot with maybe the shame around pivoting or maybe the the constantly questioning of yourself if you can just sit with something and give it time to kind of bloom and flourish how it's supposed to.

AMY: Yeah, I think that that has been my experience. And I'm curious like how, what your experience has been with the went once you've switched to that mindset and how it has affected your business. Because I feel like I was just in that hustle mentality for two years, I mean, year and a half to year, like a really long time. And like you mentioned, like it started to bring up this shame that every single time I would change my mind or make a new announcement, the shame would get increasingly more of like, are people gonna think that? What are what are we going to think that I'm changing my mind again? Or that I'm launching this thing again.

And I really do feel like I've gotten rid of a lot of that by taking that processing time and sitting on something because then you make all your changes all your mind, you don't stop changing your mind, but you just do it internally.

KATE: Yeah, instead of publicly. And I feel like it gives you a sense of confidence because you've sat with it and you you know, what's the right decision, I think that shame can come from lack of confidence. So if you're, if you're like, Okay, I have this idea and like, let's put it out into the world, and you're excited about it, maybe you're not sure that it's, it's like, it, you're not super confident in the offer, you're not super confident on like, all of the steps with it. And it can cause yourself to have a lot of that doubt and a lot of that. What will people think or that kind of stuff.

And not always like sometimes you know, like you are confident and you know, this is the right decision. And you still have the thought of, but what are people going to think? What are people going to say? Should I be changing my mind like this much? And I think that that's also normal.

But I think just taking time to sit and process and reflect and when I say time, like, even a couple days, like it doesn't need to be like, six months, you're mulling over the same decision. And but I think that that can just it can give you more confidence because it gives you more clarity.

And so then you know, like in your court, this is what I'm going to be working on. And this is like how I'm going to be serving the people in my community.

So I think it can help with that. Like I said, like, it's all a very fine line. But I definitely have seen such a benefit from slowing down. And honestly, it's just felt like, like my, my very first when I first started thinking like, okay, I think it's time to shift into mom's day out and shift and shift my business and focus on this and focus on like a different type of content and that kind of stuff. I actually asked my husband, I was like, can you just like pray a prayer over me? That is like, God will just make it obvious. Like I just need it to be obvious. I just need someone to tell me this is the right decision. Like, because I feel like it's the right decision.

But I feel like I just need to know because I don't want to put time and energy into this if it's not. And I don't want to like lack any sort of clarity. And honestly, like over several weeks after that, it was like one thing after another of like being obvious.

And there was even a point where I was talking to my husband and I was like, I feel like it's so obvious that I'm like questioning it. Like I'm like, but is that, did you actually mean that? Or is that a coincidence? Like what is that? And it's kind of that thing where it's like when you buy a car or you want to buy a car and now you see that car everywhere.

And so it was like, I was thinking about it and then like all these things were just coming up and I'm, and then I just decided like, this is not a coincidence. This is, it's obvious that this is what I'm supposed to do, where I'm supposed to be. And once I made that decision, a sense of peace and just, I don't know, just like settle. I just felt settled.

And like, okay, it's sometimes not even the decision itself. It's the act of actually making a decision. I'm like, I just want to make a decision. Am I doing this? Am I not doing this? And sometimes that can be really hard. And sometimes it's not about like what the actual answer is. It's just actually making that decision.

And since then I feel like just, I've met people that I'm like now connecting with that aligns with the mission and aligns with, you know, I'm able to help them and they're able to help me. And it's like this sense of community. And then, you know, a door will open to an opportunity that I maybe not even noticed before. Like the door might have opened, but I wouldn't have, I would have missed it, you know.

And ever since then it's like, it's just been about waiting, like not forcing anything, kind of just waiting, working on like lots of stuff behind the scenes that we know are going to be things that we want to do. But in terms of like, okay, like what's the next step? Which one should we do first? Like that kind of thing. It's a lot of like listening to what people need and seeing what people are asking about and having conversations with people that is really driving the way that the business is going versus how I've built some businesses in the past where it's been, okay, what offer do I want to put out into the world? I still want to help people, but like this is the offer I want to put out. And then it's like, but is that actually the offer that someone needs? Is that actually like the content they want to see? And so I think for me, one thing I've been really telling myself over the last couple months is like, it's not about me.

My business is not about me. It is about the people I'm going to serve. And I will be the first to admit that there have been times where my business, especially before kids, my business was about me. It was about like, like the goals on my vision board were things that I wanted to accomplish. And while I still had like this heart of like, no, but I like want to help people and I want to encourage them and all this stuff, like that can be true.

But it can also be true that your business can become more about you and your goals and that can send you down a whole different spiral versus when you realize that your business isn't about you. It's like this sense of freedom where it's like you don't need, you don't need affirmation from other people about yourself or like what you're doing because you know it's not about you. It's about like how you're serving other people. If someone says something negatively like, oh, why is she changing her mind again?

Or like, which I have not experienced, shockingly, even with all my changes, at least not to my face. But it does like roll off your back a little bit easier because it's not about you. And it's just when you realize and you truly believe that your business, your mission, your purpose is not about you. And it's about the people you're going to serve. I think you show up better because for me, I'm like, what if I'm hiding or sitting on an idea for too long or not wanting to share something because I'm afraid of whatever or not pivoting because I'm afraid of what people will think or I'm afraid of that shame. I am now not only holding myself back, but I'm holding other people back from getting what they need or I'm holding them back from seeing that they can make the pivot or they can make the change. And like that's selfish.

And when I realized it's not about me, it's about like what I can show people how I can encourage others and just stop hiding so that other people can step into like whatever their thing is and whatever their greatness is. And however, we're going to help people through mom's doubt collected. I think that it just everything becomes a lot easier.

AMY: Yeah. A lot easier.

KATE: Yeah. Shifting where you find it's a lot of inertia, but yeah, I mean, it doesn't, it's never an easy road.

AMY: No, no.

KATE: Shifting where you find your confidence is so huge to that shame piece. And I think like the spiritual part of it too, like confidence in that, like God has given you this calling and this idea for a reason and the confidence comes from, no, this is what he wants me to do. I can't, I'm like, I can't even tell you, like, actually my husband asked me this. He's used to me changing my mind. I swear though, the worst thing I can say to my husband is I have an idea. He just like shakes in his boots.

And he asked me, he said, you know, what makes this time different? Because it's been several times. And he says, you know, what makes this time different? And I don't blame him for asking that question at all. I think that's a question I had to ask myself too. And I told him, I said, I can't even give you a reason. I can't even tell you like, what makes this time different other than the fact that like, it's not even like my idea. It's not even like my, what is the word? Like, it's not even, it's what God is calling me to do.

And like, it's me walking in obedience to that calling and seeing like, okay, like, what do you, what are you going to use me for? And that though, is what makes it different. Because before it was, you know, what did I want to do? And I love Momsdale.

Of course I want to do it, but it was driven from a place of making decisions solely based on like, business decisions or what I was wanting to put out into the world versus what I feel like God is calling me to do, how he's wanting me to serve through essentially like ministry and what like my greater purpose is.

And so when he asked me that question, I was like, I don't know how else to give you like reassurance that like, this is the last time that I'll pivot because like, when it's not, but all I can tell you is like, it's not about me.

Like at the end of the day, like this pivot feels so different because it's not about me and it is about this higher calling and this higher like purpose. And I don't know what it's going to end up being. And I have, you know, I have ideas and goals that I would like it to be. And that I feel like is really aligned to like the mission.

But at the end of the day, like he is the only one he's already had it all figured out. He already knows like what it's, what it's going to do. And I'm just walking toward that and seeing what happens essentially. And that even brings it back to the processing piece because I am a very like gut person, but that's also hides so much to the Holy Spirit and to start discernment.

And I feel like if we are just making snap decisions and immediately acting, we're not leaving any room to listen to the Holy Spirit. And that's why we find more clarity the longer we sit on something because it gives him the opportunity to place this little things that are like confirmations or the opposite.

AMY: Yeah, because I had a situation where I saw this event. It seemed perfect. It seemed exactly aligned. And then the more I sat with it and the more I learned about it, I was like, oh, wait, maybe, no, that's not me. And to think I could have just signed up for it and then then what?

So it's so important.

KATE: It is. And I think it's so hard to because sometimes you won't get that confirmation. Sometimes you won't. You won't get the sign. You won't get the things that make it obvious.

AMY: Yeah. It's like it's that gut feeling. I think deep down we all know and also knowing that like the right decision right now, it could be the right decision. But in a year from now, maybe you're changing it. And again, it's all stepping stones. I'll get you closer. I'm curious what's your Enneagram one.Do you have a nine wing or two?

KATE: No, I think I'm a two wing.

AMY: Okay. Yeah.

KATE: The idealist feels really like that's me.

AMY: Yeah. I'm a nine. So I'm a peacemaker and nine.

KATE: I know there's, I don't know what's on about the Enneagram, but I know there's certain types that rely very strongly on their gut and nines because I know I'm a nine.

Nines are like gut instinct types. And even to the point where my husband is like, if your gut says to do something or not do something, like we listened to it.

Like, cause it's been, I can't even tell you a time where it's been wrong. And like you said, I think it's less about like my gut and more about like this discernment and the conversation that I'm having with the Holy Spirit.

And that's, that's why this time feels so different because I have taken a lot of time this year to slow down, to take that time and to not make, you know, very snap one off decisions.

And I think that, I think a lot of people could benefit from that, but I also don't regret like, you know, this stuff in the past, because that's all gone exactly where I'm supposed to be.

That's how I feel too. Like, I know it's cliche. People are like, I don't say no regrets. I kind of do.

Like I'm like, yeah, I think has gotten me to this point and I see how it all weaves together. And I mean, it's okay. It's just, it's okay. I think that's the biggest thing that I'm kind of thinking overarching with this is just the permission piece. Permission. It's like, it's okay to change your mind.

AMY: It is so okay.

KATE: And you don't need permission, but if you're listening to this, you feel like you need permission. I'll give you permission. You can absolutely change your mind because it does not make sense that we're supposed to figure it all out when we're 18 years old. Like our brains are not even fully developed by then.

And we're like, oh, okay, we got to make this decision on what we're going to do the rest of our life. Like, that doesn't make sense. And I'm such a different person than I was at, I'm 29, I'll be 30 next month. And I'm like, I'm such a different person than I was at 19, or 23, or 26, or 28. Like a different person than I was a year ago. I was just having a conversation with my mom today.

And we were, we were talking about like random things. And I was on a walk and I had her on the phone and we were talking about things. She's like, I feel like you've done like a 180 on like several things that you used to believe or even used to like preach about, or like, be bought into.

And now I just don't believe those things anymore. And I think that not only do we need to give ourselves permission for that, but we need to get other people permission to change. And like other people, a chance to make decisions and have opinions about things based on the information they have at the time, based on experiences. Because I am so different than I was a couple of years ago when I started, you know, in business. And you don't, you do not need permission, but I hope that like you give yourself the permission to do it. And, and just try things out. Like, you know, I grew up with a mom that told me to try things out and like told me, told me not to pick a degree when I started college.

Cause she was like, you know, just take some classes and figure out what you like. And I was feeling so much like pressure from society and like the outside world to pick something. And then I had my mom who I'm so close with and I, and so I respect her so much, telling me not to. And so it was like constantly feeling pulled. And, and then when I would have this like plan in my head of how things were going to work out, and she always teases me about this as like, if my plan A like doesn't or didn't go the way that I thought it was going to, like the wheels came off. Like I felt like the world was ending.

Cause you know, it's, it's this, you think it's going to happen one way and it doesn't. And it's funny just cause, you know, even when my mom was in college, she did not pick a degree until she was a junior and literally she got called to the Dean's office and they told her like, you have to stop being undeclared.

Like you're supposed to graduate next year. And they had laid out all of her credits and they said, you know, these are the, where you have the most credit, you need to pick something. And so she ended up getting a business degree cause that's what she had the most credits in, but she had so many different interests. And I think that speaks to being multi passionate and also like being multi passionate is not a bad thing. It's actually makes you like a very, I think well-rounded human being.

And I think that like when we allow ourselves to also try things and then be like, I don't think that's really like a good fit for me. Like that's okay too. And that's, you know, how I experienced with real estate. It was like, I'm going to try it out. It sounds cool. It's something I've always been interested in. So let's try it out. Let's see how it goes. And it just wasn't like the best fit.

So I just changed my mind and it's not, it's not like something bad needs to happen or you need to feel like you failed. Like it's like, okay, like that wasn't, that wasn't it for me. And I've always said that at the end of my life, I want to look back and instead of thinking what if I want to think like, Oh well, you know, Oh well, I tried that.

I much rather think like, okay, Oh well, I tried that. It didn't work out versus like, what if I would have tried that? What if I would have given that a shot? Because you never know. Like the, those things could have been the things that ended up being like the thing for you. And I don't, I don't want to live life wondering. I want to make sure I try things and I figure out, you know, where, where it all fits.

AMY: So I love that. I mean, you're already giving advice, but do you have any other advice or thoughts that you would want to share with someone who is in that spot of like, I feel like I might should do this, but I'm not really sure.

KATE: I think like the first step is a lot to do some reflection, ask yourself some questions. It could literally be like a 30 minute journal session. Get like a nice cup of coffee or like a drink, like whatever, you know, whatever that is, an Olli pop. I've been super into all the possibility also like lemon water, you know, whatever is delicious for you.

Sit down and like spend some time journaling about the thing and asking yourself like, how does this thing align with where I'm at in this season of my life? How does this support the goals that I want for my family, for my life? That's been a big thing for me too is like when I've had to let go of things because they, they're not, they're things that I want to do.

They're things that I so badly want to do and I'm so passionate about, but they do not align with what I want my life to look like and what I want our family life to look like. And so those are things that I've had to like say no to or say no, not right now to. And so I think just spending time with questions and asking yourself those things and reflecting on that.

And then I would say like the next thing is if it all makes sense and it all aligns, I would really just try it. Like just try it out and it can be something so similar. It doesn't have to be like this massive shift. You like do a total rebrand and you do, you know, all the kind, all the kind of things, but it's, it's just try it out.

Like do something where you can dip your toe in it and see what it is because how do we know? How do we know if it, if we're going to even like it, if we don't try it, you know, and how do we know if it's not the right fit? If we don't try it. And I think that's something that's so important to remember.

Like we would never tell you know, a toddler, like not to try different foods because they might not, they, they don't think they're going to like it, but like, what did they do? And they have to, you know, they have to try it out or even sports. Like when you're growing up, like there's people that grow up doing several different sports before they find like the one they really want to focus on because they're trying it out.

They're seeing what they like. They're seeing what they're good at. They're seeing, you know, where their gifts naturally land. And I think it's the same in entrepreneurship. You have to try some things out and, and be okay with trying it out and then being like, it's not for me and that's okay. And going and trying to figure something else out, you know, it'll come to you. It'll happen naturally, but I think it's important to try. That's important for me to hear. Cause I'm like, okay, if I'm going to change, I have to like do the whole thing.

And I'm such a like all or nothing person. So advice for myself as well. But you know, it's the same thing with like, yeah, we pivoted into the focus of mom's day out collective and really getting all of that up and going, but I still have your behind the scenes BFF. I'm still here to help people, you know, start their business as a virtual assistant. The course is still there. It's still really great content. It's not like I just like got rid of it and like, and not doing it at all. It's just that the focus has shifted.

The priority has shifted in terms of business and doesn't have to be so all or nothing. There's building and maintenance stages of businesses and you can have multiple businesses and just have them at different stages. You can't like build two things at once, but you could have one in one and one in the other.

AMY: Yeah, for sure.

KATE: And I felt like last year was my building of your behind the scenes BFF and your mom's day out collective had to take a back seat while I kind of figured out like, what does this even meant to be? Is it meant to be anything? Is it meant to be the main thing? Like what is it meant to be? And now that I have the answers to that, I'm able to make that shift and make that the priority and let the other business like take a back seat, take a chill pill for a minute. Yeah. Cause it's running by itself. You've done the work get it up and going.

AMY: So good. Well, I'm going to link your podcast, your website, all the behind the scenes BFF stuff. Everything will be linked so people can find you.

But my last little question is just taking a pivot from our business talk, which has been incredible and you can tie it in, but what is bringing you peace right now?

KATE: Oh man. I think what's bringing me peace right now is just having clarity and having taken time to rest and having taken time to listen to what God's calling is on my life and spending a lot of time in the word and spending a lot of time, um, surrounding myself with people that I want to be surrounded with and that kind of elevate that. Um, and I think that has brought me so much peace like in my personal life, um, especially like his promises. And I think it's also brought me a lot of peace in business overall.

And so it's just been, it's been a really, I thought, man, I thought 2022 was a big year of growth, you know, having another baby and changing my business and all this thing, but I feel like 2023 has been less action, but has been like the biggest year of growth that I've experienced. Um, which I think is good. And it's like, it's, it's just setting everything up to setting everything up for 2024.

And I already, I can't believe we're like three months away, but yeah, but yeah, it's been, it's been really cool. It's been a really, it could also be because I'm going to be 30 next month. So I'm like, I'm going to be 30. Um, so, you know, it's a lot of life changes, a lot of big things, but, um, yeah, I feel like that's, that's what's bringing me peace right now.

AMY: Yeah. I'm right there with you. I feel like I, what I've been describing as 2023 as is in an internal growth year. In myself, but also in my business, like we have seen an increase in our business, but it's mainly come from clients we already had and not new ones. And that's just been interesting for me to realize that like you said too, I think I've been the internal growth and processing and behind the scenes things are setting up preparing you for the next extra growth year.

And that's something I heard too, at that event I went to and, you know, they said like, if your business were to blow up tomorrow, could you handle it? And I'm like, and you know, six months ago, no way. I was not in like the mental state to be able to handle that growth. I also didn't have the skills that I was going to need to handle that growth.

So much as you want things to happen overnight, or you want things to happen quickly, doesn't work like that. And if it did, could you handle it? And so I feel like when you have these seasons of internal growth and you have these seasons of reflection and like slowing down, you're preparing yourself and you're being prepared to be able to handle it and that things are going to come your way and you're going to be able to handle it and take care of it how it needs to be taken care of.

KATE: Absolutely.

AMY: The little quick TikTok videos that are like, I made, you know, 15K in my first six months. It's like, don't just don't pay attention to that.

KATE: Yeah. Just don't. It's probably not sustainable. There's so much behind the scenes that you don't see. That's a five second video. Like, yes. And it just, it does people at the service because not every, even if that's true, even if that's the true statement, I mean, 50K in my first six months, not everyone has the skills to be able to do that.

Not everyone is prepared to be able to do that. And to think that like sales or entrepreneurship or business is just something that like anyone can do. It might be true to an extent, but you have to have a certain skill set. You have to have, be, you know, you have to be prepared. You have to be able to know how to handle things. You have to have knowledge and experience. And I think it does a disservice to people to, it over glamorizes, you know, what entrepreneurship can be. It's a beautiful thing and I am so thankful for it, but I think it does people a disservice to be sharing stuff like that without sharing all the other stuff too.

AMY: Yeah. And I think that this whole conversation has been just a great like, pull back the curtain. There are seasons of doubt and shame and processing and less action. And that's like necessary and part of it and should be like welcomed.

KATE: Yeah, for sure. Absolutely.

AMY: Thank you, Kate. This has been such a good conversation and I know that it will be really impactful because a lot of us are probably struggling with this just under the surface. So thank you.

KATE: Yeah. Well, thank you so much for having me.

AMY: Yes. All right, guys. Thank you for listening and we will see you all next week.

Thank you so much for joining us for today's episode. Don't forget to connect with us on YouTube, Instagram, and Facebook, and we would love it if you would leave a review wherever you're listening. We'll see you next week for more tips for how to become a peaceful entrepreneur.